Nelson Hollerway

“Good mornin’ DJ,” said James.
“What’s up youngin’ you gonna be late for school you betta hurry up,” replied DJ.
“Aight DJ Imma hurry up,” James muttered back.
James lived alone with no one but his mother and sister. His mother had been raising him and his sister for a long time by herself and she was raising her two children with a lot of success.
“Wake up, Jaz, wake up!!” yelled James at his younger sister.
“I’m up stop James I’m up, Imma tell mommy…”
“No you not she ain’t here!”
“Shut up I’m awake.” Jaz was only six but she thought she was grown with enough attitude to kill ya. So James woke up his sister and continued to get ready for school wondering where his mother was. James was used to her not being home all the time but she always saw him before he went to school. James was in the second grade and his sister was in kindergarten.
“DJ where’s my mom?” asked Jaz.
“She ain’t here you midget, just get ready for school so you don’t miss da bus okay,” DJ answered with aggravation he didn’t want to be bothered by Diane’s kids. Diane was out late the night before and she came home and got into an argument with her boyfriend. The argument got heated as Diane’s boyfriend DJ was in a bad mood because he didn’t have any hash.
Well James got him and his sister ready for school and they got outside with just enough time to run for the bus out of there “middle class” housing development, they lived in the projects, the best they’d ever seen anyway. James ran out the door with a paco jeans jump suit and his sister was as cute as could be when they left the house. She was wearing a pair of jeans and shirt with her favorite person all over them. The Barbi clothes and bookbag she had was sporting was a perfect reflection of her young attitude. She was spoiled but just as much as James was.
After a seemingly normal friday in school Jaz and James waited in their bus lines to get on the school bus and go home. Most of the time if their mom wasn’t home to see them off to school she would pick them up from school right off the bus. No one could tell her she couldn’t stop the bus to get her kids off the bus, shit they were her kids. Both Jaz and James knew she was probably going to come get them but strangely she didn’t. As young as the two kids were they thought nothing of her not showing up. James walked his little sister up to the front door of their project building and rung the door bell. No one from their apartment buzzed them in, James buzzed it again. Still no reply, so Jaz and James both rang the bell for one of their friend’s houses. Just as the pair walked into the building the police pulled up and ran into the main hallway right passed the kids. The kids followed behind them slowly as the cops happened to be running down their hall. “James, James! Come here. Jaz,” yelled their Aunty. Their mother’s only sister had come over to them and told them that when they went into the apartment, to run to their rooms and pack their bags because their mom told her to pick them up for the weekend. The kids did exactly as she said.
They didn’t go to her house often, but when they did, they had fun. They were excited. “Aunty, ma mom at ya house?” asked James
“No, she’s not J but you’ll talk to her soon okay?” Aunty didn’t want to lie to him, but she had to. James nodded and said okay. James was a momma’s boy, but not in the “in love with his mom” way, but his mom was his dog. He and his mom had a lot of fun together, playing videogames and play fighting. His sister and his mom always went out together so it was like his mom’s way of making quality time with her son. “I wanna talk to ma mom now!” said Jaz. Her Aunty told her she would talk to her tonight or tomorrow. Aunty didn’t really know when they would talk to their mom. James and Jaz asked about their mom every time they had an unoccupied second.
Early one morning before school James flipped on the TV and his Aunty always told him not to turn on the TV but he did anyway. On the screen, what he saw changed his life for ever, he saw on the screen that his mom was a missing person and that they had a suspect in custody for the possible murder of his mom Diane. The anchorman read, “Next today a missing woman, Diane Fosse, from Maple Shade , New Jersey has today been announced dead after 45 days on the missing person list for our area. Police have a suspect in custody for the murder of New Jersey mother of two, a little boy and girl, ages seven and six now living with their Aunt of Mt. Holly. James wasn’t the only person in his family watching the news at that time in the morning, his aunt was to and she new he was watching it when she came into the living room to drive him to school.
James didn’t go to school that day or any day for the next week neither did his sister. James was so shocked he had no reaction and perhaps everything he had gone through in his life he couldn’t cry because his anger was too large. He sat quiet and spoke a word to no one. Jaz was an innocent little girl and she knew what death was but she didn’t completely understand. She cried and cried in her Aunty’s arms for hours at her shrink’s office. James sat in the same chair everyday for two months, same time everyday, and didn’t speak one word. James didn’t react to anything he didn’t talk for months. He was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder, depression, and the shrink thought he was dangerous to himself and everyone around him because at any minute could just explode and do anything even though he was only seven. James sat and colored and painted for almost a year without saying anything. One day his psychiatrist just stopped talking to him and he reacted.
“What the f(BEEP)k is your problem you got tired of pissin’ me off with your b(BEEP)l s(BEEP)t questions huh??”
“NO I am not going to talk to you because you don’t talk to me…You’ve sat in my office for eleven months wasting my paper, paint, pens, markers and all of my pencils and I am tired of it.”
“Well, I’ll tell you what I’m tired of! I’m tired of all the people walking around like they know how I feel! All of the adults telling me that I should talk about how I feel and that everything will be ok! It’s not gonna be!! It never will be!! I hate you and all the other mean people who don’t know my mom and pretend that they care!!! You wanna see wasting?? Huh??” James began to run around the room trashing all of the art supplies. He was so angry. The suppressed rage was slowly defusing. The young boy had reached his breaking point. He grabbed scissors and violently approached the shrink. The fear in her eyes almost overshadowed the argents in her face, trying to act as if the child’s act of pain had no effect on her own heart. She knew what she was asking for when she yelled at him in his most fragile state. James was no longer James. He had transformed into the demons that had plagued his mind throughout the last couple of months. The shrink, who was a few moments ago, the object of his frustration, was now just an innocent caught in an inner feud of a young boy who didn’t know what to make of the recent changes in his life.
The once young confused boy had mentally turned into a misguided teen in a matter of seconds, and he was about to make the biggest mistake of his life. The scissors in his hand was the only thing that stood between him and the woman. The sharp metal point slowly pierced her stomach and cut through her flesh. She tried to scream but the shock from the past five seconds stole her sound. James stared at her as she slowly started to bleed heavier. The shrink was stunned with fright. She couldn’t move. She could only look at him with regret that she couldn’t do more to help. Now that it was her life at stake, her shallow selfishness allowed her to care about his wellbeing. Eyes that were glassy now were dry and dull. James paced around the room before leaving. He walked out of the room without thinking anything of what had happened. James had a new state of mind now. His whole destiny had just taken a new path making sure that he would never be the same.