November 28, 2007 ````` Kyle Sanders
Creative Writing
The Show Down at the Playground!
“This is our park!” yelled a gang of small black kids. “No it is not!” Screamed the funny looking Asians kids, “This playground belong to use, we been here since……since…… since I don’t know, but we was here before yall was. Screaming little Tonyeta Ikea in a fierce voice, No! We always been here cried out little Ken Sue. The two side were heated and ready to fight, but Little Tonyeta Ikea said, “No, we should handle this type of problem by having fun and winning at the same time” explained Tonyeta.
The first challenge was to see who could swing the highest. Little Ken Sue decided that she would take the challenge and represent for her team and little Tonyeta Ikea said she would take the challenge and represent for her team. They both Tonyeta Ikea and Little Ken Sue was pump and ready, they had sparks flying when they jump on the set of swings and waited for Ken Sue cousin Baby Jackie aka B.J. to say go. On your mark, get set……………..GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They was off kicking they feet into the air, it look like Ken Sue was the highest, but Tonyeta Ikea just had more leg power and overcame little Ken Sue in the challenge.
The next show down was the pull-up test, the pull-up test was a piece of cake thought little Ken Sue. It was flaming hot outside and was made it very hotter was the groups of kids yelling and jumping around. The two girls was under the monkey bars getting ready to pull for they’re life. Once again B.J. who was Ken Sue little brother came out and ON YOUR MARK……….GET SET……….GO! AND THAT WAS IT THE TWO WAS BACK AT IT TRYING TO BEAT EACH OTHER. Tonyeta Ikea didn’t have upper body strength like Ken Sue, which gave Ken Sue the upper hand and leaving Tonyeta Ikea in the dust. Believe it or not, but I was almost wrong Tonyeta Ikea almost beat Ken Sue. Ken Sue did 15 pull-ups and Tonyeta had done 13 pull-ups surprisingly because she got tired at 5.
The last Showdown was indeed the hardest showdown so for help both Ken Sue and Tonyeta Ikea was given a partner of they’re choice Ken Sue picks B.J. and Tonyeta Ikea got her little brother Kareem Abdul. “So want again it on; let get it poppin” said an older kid who was watching. ON YOUR MARK GET SET GO! Little Ken Sue went running up the sliding board like a ninja I guess she must have been watching them karate movies Little Tonyeta Ikea and her brother grabbed Ken Sue legs and drags her off the sliding board. B.G, tripped Kareem making Kareem hit is face on the metal sliding board leaving him hurt, everything got quiet leaving everybody speechless even the old men playing chess. Next thing you know it was a all out war, until the older kid who was watching scream out and said “LOOK AT YA’LL FIGHTING OVER A PARK, A PARK THAT DOSEN’T EVEN BELONG TO YA’LL.” He paused then he went on saying, “how dumb it was fighting each other when we should be playing with each other. Everybody agree and decided that it was dumb to fight over something so petite; and that how the showdown at the playground ended.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
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3 comments:
Exposition
1. It took place in a playground but it doesn’t exactly tell when.
2.
Conflict and climax
1. Tonyeta Ikea faced the challenges with the Asian girl Ken Sue to win the park.
2. After the last show down when the older kid watching stood up and told them how dumb they were for fighting over a park that doesn’t even belong to them.
Denouement
1. The story ends with older kid telling them they were dumb for fighting over a playground that none of them own.
2. Instead of the older kid telling them that was dumb, you should have one of the kids realize that for themselves
Characterization
1. The characters are Ken and Tonyeta and they are both dominant because they both want control over the park.
2. It doesn’t really say anything directly about the main characters besides they are Asian or black.
3. I learned that both of the girls are bossy and will stand up for what they believe even if it is wrong.
4. I think you should give a little background information about the two girls’ relationship.
Jose Ruiz
Sumayah Jeter
November 29, 2007
Creative Writing
Leo 6th period
Questions & Responds
EXPOSITION
1. WHEN/WHERE DOES THIS STORY TAKE PLACE? The story “Showdown at the Playground” Kyle Sanders, takes place at a park.
CONFLICT AND CLIMAX
1. WHAT PROBLEMS DOES THE CENTRAL CHARACTER FACE? Each team faced the same problem. The problem was, both teams wanted to own the playground.
2. WHEN DO YOU LEARN HOW THE PROBLEM IS WORKED OUT? I find out that the problem worked out at the end.
DENOUEMENT
1.HOW DOES THE STORY END? A man watching the game helped them realize that they were fighting over something petite. He also told them that they shouldn’t fight over something that neither of them owned in the first place.
2. SUGGEST AN EXTRA SCENE TO STRENGTHEN THE PLOT. One scene I choose to strengthen is the part where Tonyeta and Ken were racing on the swing. I think he should have used fugative language and he could have been more descriptive about the way they looked, with their facial expressions.
CHARACTERIZATION
1. WHO ARE THE CHARACTERS INVOLVED IN THE STORY? HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE THEIR ROLES? Two gangs Asians and Blacks children were involved in this story. I would describe their roles as being two rival gangs that compete for a specific territory in which they both wanted.
2. DIRECT CHARACTERIZATION: WHAT DOES THE AUTHOR TELL US "DIRECTLY" ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST (MAIN CHARACTER) FROM HIS OR HER PHYSICAL APPEARANCE AND PERSONALITY? He tells me that they are controlling and they will do anything to get what they want.
3. INDIRECT CHARACTERIZATION: WHAT DO WE LEARN "INDIRECTLY" ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST FROM WHAT HE OR SHE SAYS (DOES)? WHAT DO WE LEARN ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST FROM WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT HIM OR HER? I learn that each gang is unaware about they would fight over something they don’t own or can never have.
4. SUGGEST AN ADDED DETAIL TO STRENGTHEN THE DESCRIPTION OF ONE MAJOR OR MINOR CHARACTER. The story is good but it needs a little more work with grammar. I think he should have used a little more sensory details.
EXPOSITION
The story takes place at a park.
CONFLICT AND CLIMAX
1. The problem the central character faces is that a group of black kids try to come and play in the park when the Asian kids had it first.
2.I learn the problem is worked out at the end of the story.
3. HOW DOES THE STORY END? They realized that fighting over a park that was not even thiers was simple and childish.
4. SUGGEST AN EXTRA SCENE TO STRENGTHEN THE PLOT.
Maybe not coming straight out and telling readers that the problem was solved. They should have a problem in the solution. (just a suggestion)
CHARACTERIZATION
1. WHO ARE THE CHARACTERS INVOLVED IN THE STORY? HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE THEIR ROLES? Ken Sue and Tonyeta Ikea, they were the main characters and only ones that the author mentioned.
2. DIRECT CHARACTERIZATION: WHAT DOES THE AUTHOR TELL US "DIRECTLY" ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST (MAIN CHARACTER) FROM HIS OR HER PHYSICAL APPEARANCE AND PERSONALITY? Some people are Asian and some are black
3. INDIRECT CHARACTERIZATION: WHAT DO WE LEARN "INDIRECTLY" ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST FROM WHAT HE OR SHE SAYS (DOES)? WHAT DO WE LEARN ABOUT THE PROTAGONIST FROM WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT HIM OR HER?That they are imature.
4. SUGGEST AN ADDED DETAIL TO STRENGTHEN THE DESCRIPTION OF ONE MAJOR OR MINOR CHARACTER.maybe a lttle more diaolouge.
-Sheree Page
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